I love creativity. I scoot on the carpet over out-of-the-box thinking. But some boxes were never meant to be crawled out of for the safety and wellbeing of the universe as we know it.

A crochet breakfast? Sure, it’s cute. I have no problems.

A knitted peacock hat / gas mask combo? Sweetie, drugs are illegal and do bad things to your brain.

How about a hamburger dress? This burger is going straight to my hips!

A cashmere donut necklace anyone? A must-have when attending the Policeman’s Ball.

And finally, the bacon and egg jellyfish. It’s a bacon and egg jellyfish. Need I say more?